This article was written by my lovely friend, Laura.
First and foremost I am a mum, then I’m a truckers wife and I’m also a preschool worker. But at the end of the day I’m an Endometriosis and Adenomyosis sufferer and those issues take its toll on the above identities, plus give me a reason to carry on and not let these conditions take over my life.
It took me about 16 years to finally get my diagnosis. From the age of 14 I started to experience very heavy periods; I was flooding my bed and using so many pads, plus falling off chairs at school when I had fainted because of the pain. I was always told by doctors that it will help when I was of child bearing age and had some children. My mum had a terrible memory of her periods so we both kind of assumed it was passed on to me and didn’t really go full on with getting answers. I was told by my GP who I’ve now moved from that it was my normal and all women have to put up with periods, he cant make them go away!
In the years that passed I was put onto many contraceptive pills, some worked for a while but never really helped in the long run. And when I was 17 I decided the implant may be good for me – it wasn’t and I had that taken out a year after. It was then I got pregnant with my first child. I was lucky enough to become a mummy 3 times, although I’m now told that my issues during pregnancy and birth were likely because of having Adeno.
Finally this year I found an gynaecologist who straight away said “let’s get you in for a lap”, and within a month I was diagnosed with stage 4 Endometriosis and Adenomyosis. I cried, what a relief to finally have a reason for all the issues that have ruled my life for so long! I was also sterilised at the same time, and this has been both a blessing and a curse – my body no longer has any artificial hormones roaming around in it but things have got worse, the contraceptives must have been doing something to help slightly but the other effects seemed unbearable.
Becoming a mummy was the best thing I ever did, but the pain and amount of bleeding my issues bring make things hard for all of us. Ultimately my babies drag me out of bed, keep me going and give me something to keep moving for. Without that incentive I know for a fact I’d be wrapped up in my bed every single day. They need me, and I have to step up for them even on my bad days where I just want to cry. The bathroom is the place where I do just that – I cry in the shower then put on a smile and walk on out! Its by no means easy, and on the days they push my buttons too far I will admit I sit on the sofa with my head in my hands crying! They get it, they cuddle me and they agree to let up. We move on and start fresh and I remind myself how lucky I really am!
Most of the time I do this alone, as my partner in crime and best friend in the whole world is a lorry driver who can be gone for the whole week. We have been together for 10 years, and most of that time he’s pushed me to seek more opinions, more answers and given me the strength to stand up for myself. In times where I’ve sat in the doctors crying he has spoken for me, and told them their suggestion is no good, that I will not be taking that pill again. He does all this despite me being the worst wife ever when I am due on my period….I get nasty, I don’t want him near me, and he sure as Hell better be home or I will literally accuse him of cheating and cause a massive argument!
My pain has been the root cause of a lot of my mental health issues, I get very depressed and anxious which has led to lots of arguments and a near on divorce! But he’s still here, WE are still here, Team Burden, better than ever!
On my really bad days/weeks I will often call into work although I’m trying so hard to suck it up and just go in nowadays. My manager is an absolute angel, I feel so lucky she is so understanding and helpful. But I guess any manager can only take so much until they have to decide that you can no longer fulfill the job role. Which is my ultimate fear! Those little people at work are so funny and cheery you can’t help but smile when you walk in the room and one runs up and hugs your legs! However the job is quite demanding, its up and down on the floor, you have to be 100% on the ball all the time and you also have to be happy, positive and crazy. I don’t have this down to a fine art yet, I can’t smile through the back pain or get up and run at a moments notice because of leg and pelvic pain. But I’m sure going to try.
In my head this was going to be a positive and funny post, but it’s so hard to put anything funny or positive into this situation when it affects you all day every day. I do love a good positive quote though, and try to really take heed of the feelings they give me and what they mean to be. I’m aiming to put lots more on my Instagram page to hopefully give others the same feelings of hope and peace.
From my experiences and the length of time it’s taken for me to get a diagnosis, I’ve worked out that I know my own body, I know when something isn’t right and what feels right to me and I’ve also worked out that any woman that is experiencing something like this, the pain, the uncontrollable bleeding, should push their doctor for that next step. Don’t settle for the “Its normal” if it is affecting your everyday life then that is not normal and it should be investigated!
Laura works in a preschool, is married and is a mother to three gorgeous children. Laura was diagnosed with Endometriosis and Adenomyosis earlier this year, and you can find her Instagram account below.